‘Jesus began to teach them that the Son of Man must suffer greatly and be rejected by the elders, the chief priests, and the scribes, and be killed, and rise after three days. He spoke this openly. Then Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him. At this he turned around and, looking at his disciples, rebuked Peter and said, “Get behind me, Satan. You are thinking not as God does, but as human beings do.” He summoned the crowd with his disciples and said to them, “Whoever wishes to come after me must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me.”’ Mark 8:31-38There’s an old Chinese proverb which says, “Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.”
I’m a teacher. It’s my vocation, my charism; it’s in my blood. I taught my baby sister to read when she was three and I was thirteen and then went on to organize a summer neighborhood nursery school camp for her and her little friends which I ran for the next three summers. I wasn’t going to charge for it, but the mothers of the tots—children I babysat for—all insisted. Still my profits were nil because I reinvested every nickel I made in treats, art supplies and games for the kids. In the military I was a part-time instructor. When I got out it was to homeschool my own children. Now I’m the Director of Religious Education for my parish. What can I say? I love to learn and I love to share that love of learning with others.
Some lessons are harder than others. One of the hardest is this one: God, and your fellow man, are here to give you a hand up, but not a hand out. There’s a difference—a big difference. Ultimately, my destiny is my own responsibility. It is the result of my own choices. Every time something happens to me, I have a choice. I can accept what happens or I can whine, complain, and blame others for my circumstances. I wish I could say I never resort to those childish forms of behavior—that I always cheerfully accept whatever circumstances I encounter. I wish that were true, but it isn’t . . . yet. I’m still working on it.
That’s why I like this chapter so much. I need this reminder. In the next hour or the next day, something will happen which I don’t like. I can focus on those things or I can keep my eyes on what I can do, my next goal, what lies ahead.
My oldest daughter graduates from high school tomorrow. I’m feeling many things as I look ahead to this milestone. Fortunately I’ve been so busy lately; I haven’t had a moment to think about my feelings concerning this event, which swing from excited to sad and from proud to lonely all in the space of five minutes. Last night we went out to help some friends who were hit hard by the May 10th tornadoes clear trees. My house needed cleaning and I was tired from a full day at work, but somehow—with His Grace—I found the energy to do everything. Best of all I forgot about my daughter growing up, graduating and moving away.
Life changes and moves on. Today I went to a funeral—always a good reminder of the brevity of this life. I know that mine is going by at a break neck speed! In the meantime, if I can lend someone a hand up, I hope I do.
And I pray that somewhere along the line I taught my daughter to fish—literally and spiritually.
3 comments:
My mom has reminded me of this old Chinese proverb many times throughout my own life. She has always stressed the importance of the personal choices we all have in life, along with the choice we have to make a difference in this world.
Your post today brings so much to mind because I have watched my own four children all graduate, leave, marry and some become parents themselves. I have felt many of the feelings you share today.
As I think about your hopes for your daughter on her graduation day, something tells me that you have indeed taught her the skills she will need to catch some very large fish as she makes her way in life. :)
God be with you as you continue the journey! You and she will both be in my prayers.
Thank you Daily Grace. Your affirmation is much appreciated and a true reflection of your very compassionate spirit. I humbly thank God for the day which brought you to my blog! You also will share in my prayers!
No matter where you look, there are many who have either experienced your pain or shared your joy. When the day ends, I always ask myself; have I done what God intended me to do? It's a tough question; frequently, I don't like the answer, or I just don't know, because I am supremely fallible by design. Then, the next morning, I am usually fortunate enough to pray the prayer Jesus taught us, and then add my own expressions of thanks that God has provided not only what I needed, but extra challenges that task me to work harder than I expected. Note they are challenges not applied to others; They are MINE to keep. Others usually don't see them... it's in keeping with the command to do good in private without notice from others. It's a tough row to hoe, for in our society we value, (wrongly in my mind) the execution of works for recognition. Yet, in the end, I know without question that I am doing what God intends for me to do, without the oversight of my fellow human beings.
Tomorrow, Meg graduates; yet, she has many challenges yet to face. And so does Michelle. And we have been put on this earth to provide guidance and balance for them.
I am grateful that I can bear witness to their moving on, because that means God has provided me with an opportunity to glimpse, ever so slight, a view into his world. How difficult it truly is to stand by and let one's children move on.. and here we are, doing just that. And yet, tomorrow is another day for us to learn from this great textbook of life. In the final analysis, it's all what God intends, as much as I personally don't care for it. This is, after all, not my or our world... but that of the Eternal God which showers blessings upon us, no matter how miniscule we may perceive them to be. Everything shall turn out right... and you, my CBar, have done the best you could in following God's path for you. The proof is in how our daughters have turned out, with your help and the guidance of God. Do not discount his help, and do not Discount your efforts. They have all turned for the best.
XOBAR
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